Holidays
So yesterday I went for a Deepavali open house. As usual, I know what to expect. I was the only one who is not an Indian there. I said 'awkward' for a thousand times. It was so awkward. I knew it was going to be like that. I just have to stand it. The last 2 years didn't make any difference too. It was all the same. It was so boring. I was sitting there like a dumb ass while others were chatting away in Tamil. The food was terrible, as usual. Lol. I am so sorry but nothing pleases me. I am really hard to please. I don't feel entertained at all. What I think is my friend should just entertain me the most because I was the loner there. Really, no one seems to talk to me like I am some kind of weirdo. If I were her, I wouldn't leave someone sitting there doing nothing. I would try my best to not let the person be bored. I was bored to death.
There was a point where it was so bored the topic 'boyfriend' came out of the blue. I know nothing about boyfriends and suddenly it was in our conversation. Lol. I knew my friend wouldn't have one too. So I was like 'Hey we are single and forever alone bla bla bla.' What stupid thing was that????? LOL. Anyway, I now imagine if i were to have a boyfriend. OMG. So awkward?!?!?! Ew?!?!?! What?!?!?! It would be the greatest news in the whole planet. It would be a big news for me. Others would be so surprise I guess??? Everyone would be like 'OMG SANDRIA HAS A BOYFRIEND!' OMG WHO IS SANDRIA'S BOYFRIEND?!' Haha I will be expecting all those face expressions. You know what. I will not believe myself too. It won't happen. I don't see a vision of it happening anytime now. No.
I think now I will just focus on my life. Haha. What am I talking about? I think I must learn how to organize my life. I need to take a long time to really understand what is love and boyfriends. For now, I must plan of useful things that I can do during the holidays. For example, playing with my dog, spending time with him. That is something wise to do. During my school days, I spent less time with my dog. I was so busy with books. I hate it. I hate how studying took all my precious time away.
Sadly, STPM isn't over. I have another year of hell. I really don't know what to expect. People say learning is fun. I think it is fun to learn new things. But I think it is an enjoyable ride. But all these pressure is making learning a torturing journey. You know what, all these excuses, I don't want to say it either. But it just have to come along, especially after exams. You will hear people say 'I have studied this and that, but none of it were asked in the exam.' Those who studied well will keep quiet. And so are the 'ifs' too. 'If only I studied a little harder... and so and so...' We hear all these excuses. That is just life.
STPM is not hard, and so are all the other exams at anywhere. It is we who chose and have our mind set that it is hard and that is how it will be. Anyway, this is not how it should be. The main thing about education is that we should make learning fun. But then we hear, students committing suicide. Why is this happening? Why are students having all these negative thinking? What is causing them to have such thinking? I don't know but people will say I am complaining. I am not being grateful.
WE will all continue living life. No matter how hard it is, life goes on... We can complain all we want... But still nothing changes... It will only make a difference if we are do what is impossible. I really don't know how to explain.
I am now spending time with my senior dog, Bruno. He is so old. He is 9 years old. And he is blind. Yeah. I feel so sorry for him. He couldn't see thus he bangs the door and most of the things he comes contact into. So I feel bad. But life must go on. WE need to give extra care and attention to him. Although some times it is really annoying that he pees in the house and also, because of him being blind, it is so much harder to care for his needs.
As an animal lover, I believe that abandoning a dog, when he is aging is not a solution. I will not abandon him. No way will I do that. I will care for him till the end of time. There are many times that I have failed to care for him. I feel guilty that I am not carrying out my responsibility. Caring for a pet is not easy. Seriously. It will be a great loss to me if something happens to Bruno. I mean, he has been here with us, for so long. Since my primary school years, till now, halfway through pre-university. He has journey with me, through all the times. I feel that, not having a pet in the house, not having him in the house, will be so quiet.
For my friends, there have changed since the last time I saw them. They weren't as crazy as they used to be. Maybe that is the way they should be. For Fathiyah, I really do not know what to say, I couldn't care less anymore. She just sits in the house. Not even having the effort to drive out and drop by at my place. Not even a call. So whatever girl. I don't care anymore. I am just going to move on. Whoever comes along, joins the party. I don't think I am that bad. Am I?
I am just being me. I think I am a fun person. I love making people laugh and smile. I myself love to laugh. I love shopping but I don't have money. Hah. -To be continued...-
There was a point where it was so bored the topic 'boyfriend' came out of the blue. I know nothing about boyfriends and suddenly it was in our conversation. Lol. I knew my friend wouldn't have one too. So I was like 'Hey we are single and forever alone bla bla bla.' What stupid thing was that????? LOL. Anyway, I now imagine if i were to have a boyfriend. OMG. So awkward?!?!?! Ew?!?!?! What?!?!?! It would be the greatest news in the whole planet. It would be a big news for me. Others would be so surprise I guess??? Everyone would be like 'OMG SANDRIA HAS A BOYFRIEND!' OMG WHO IS SANDRIA'S BOYFRIEND?!' Haha I will be expecting all those face expressions. You know what. I will not believe myself too. It won't happen. I don't see a vision of it happening anytime now. No.
I think now I will just focus on my life. Haha. What am I talking about? I think I must learn how to organize my life. I need to take a long time to really understand what is love and boyfriends. For now, I must plan of useful things that I can do during the holidays. For example, playing with my dog, spending time with him. That is something wise to do. During my school days, I spent less time with my dog. I was so busy with books. I hate it. I hate how studying took all my precious time away.
Sadly, STPM isn't over. I have another year of hell. I really don't know what to expect. People say learning is fun. I think it is fun to learn new things. But I think it is an enjoyable ride. But all these pressure is making learning a torturing journey. You know what, all these excuses, I don't want to say it either. But it just have to come along, especially after exams. You will hear people say 'I have studied this and that, but none of it were asked in the exam.' Those who studied well will keep quiet. And so are the 'ifs' too. 'If only I studied a little harder... and so and so...' We hear all these excuses. That is just life.
STPM is not hard, and so are all the other exams at anywhere. It is we who chose and have our mind set that it is hard and that is how it will be. Anyway, this is not how it should be. The main thing about education is that we should make learning fun. But then we hear, students committing suicide. Why is this happening? Why are students having all these negative thinking? What is causing them to have such thinking? I don't know but people will say I am complaining. I am not being grateful.
WE will all continue living life. No matter how hard it is, life goes on... We can complain all we want... But still nothing changes... It will only make a difference if we are do what is impossible. I really don't know how to explain.
I am now spending time with my senior dog, Bruno. He is so old. He is 9 years old. And he is blind. Yeah. I feel so sorry for him. He couldn't see thus he bangs the door and most of the things he comes contact into. So I feel bad. But life must go on. WE need to give extra care and attention to him. Although some times it is really annoying that he pees in the house and also, because of him being blind, it is so much harder to care for his needs.
As an animal lover, I believe that abandoning a dog, when he is aging is not a solution. I will not abandon him. No way will I do that. I will care for him till the end of time. There are many times that I have failed to care for him. I feel guilty that I am not carrying out my responsibility. Caring for a pet is not easy. Seriously. It will be a great loss to me if something happens to Bruno. I mean, he has been here with us, for so long. Since my primary school years, till now, halfway through pre-university. He has journey with me, through all the times. I feel that, not having a pet in the house, not having him in the house, will be so quiet.
For my friends, there have changed since the last time I saw them. They weren't as crazy as they used to be. Maybe that is the way they should be. For Fathiyah, I really do not know what to say, I couldn't care less anymore. She just sits in the house. Not even having the effort to drive out and drop by at my place. Not even a call. So whatever girl. I don't care anymore. I am just going to move on. Whoever comes along, joins the party. I don't think I am that bad. Am I?
I am just being me. I think I am a fun person. I love making people laugh and smile. I myself love to laugh. I love shopping but I don't have money. Hah. -To be continued...-
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